Saturday, March 16, 2013

All Confessed Out? {Lent Day #33}

It was just Kayla and me last night. We skied all day in Vermont {last day for the season, and we even ended the day with a black diamond!}, came home in time for Kayla's Friday evening dance class, and then sent Kory and Cooper off to the 30 Hour Famine.  Robert made it safely to the Dominican Republic along with Pedro and Kevin.  He was able to text me quickly to let me know, and leave his phone on long enough for a Facebook photo upload. He also said they had a great appointment with the local Compassion International director there.  So excited to hear about future opportunities for our church to serve there!
As much as we miss them, it's kinda fun to have all of the men out of the house for a while!  Though we were super hungry after skiing, we chose not to eat or talk about our dinner plans until the boys left, as their final meal was the one we packed for the ski lodge at lunchtime.  As soon as they were out the door, though, we drove to Whole Foods.  We planned to just run in and grab something to take home, and we did just that, but not before a quick trip into Old Navy nearby.  Kayla found a cute Easter dress and matching cardigan there in record time, and then we walked a couple of doors down to Whole Foods.  We each got a drink, some Indian food {Chicken Tikka-Masala , Aromatic Yellow Rice, Saag Paneer = yum!} and a salad to share. We headed home, put on our pj's, ate our dinner, and snuggled on the couch with a movie ~ Pitch Perfect ~ which was a little ridiculous, but somewhat cute and entertaining. Then we went to bed {always together when Dad is gone} exhausted from the black diamond run.  Just kidding.  It really wasn't that difficult.  Actually, the blue run that we did afterward was much more horrific, and we're both still feeling the effects of that one!
I usually run five or six miles on Friday mornings {Mon, Wed. and Thurs., too}, but I haven't been able to run on Fridays lately due to skiing, since we usually leave the house at 7:30am. So, even though skiing is great exercise, I was still longing for my run this morning.  This bike path is where we typically run, but it certainly does not look like the above photo today.  I don't even think the trees are budding yet around here, and there is definitely nothing green anywhere ~ except for the evergreens,  of course.

I left Kayla in bed {she decided NOT to ride her bike alongside me☺}, headed out into the 28 degree weather {at least it was sunny!}, and down this familiar path.  Two miles down the path is Planet Fitness, so sometimes our routine is to run there, work out on the weight machines, and then run back home.  That's what I did this morning.

I also typically pray when I run, and try to stay focused by practicing the acrostic ~ ACTS. Adoration. Confession. Thanksgiving. Supplication.  It was hard to stay focused this morning, though ~ especially on the Confession part.  In fact, that sort of became my confession ~ that I often can't/don't stay focused in prayer, and I more often avoid confession altogether when I'm praying.  I think, for a moment, I even thought that maybe I'd confessed all there is to confess.  The thought vanished, though, upon a quick examination of my heart and attitude ~ thoughts and words.  There'll be no end to the need for confession on my part, but I'll never totally grasp that fact either.

It made me think of something else I read in John Piper's Finally Alive:

The prophet Jeremiah wrote, "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it? (Jer. 17:9).  David said in Psalm 19:12, "Who can discern his errors? Declare me innocent from hidden faults." In other words, we never get to the bottom of our sinfulness.  If our forgiveness depended on the full knowledge or our sins, we would all perish. 
 No one knows the extent of his sinfulness. It is deeper than anyone can fathom.
But the Bible does not leave us without help to know ourselves.  The fact that we cannot know fully how sinful we are, does not mean we can not know our sinfulness deeply and truly.  The Bible has a clear and devastating message about the state of our souls.  And the reason it does is so that we will know what we need and shout for joy when God gives it to us. (p. 46)

Thankful today, that even when I am at a loss for words of prayer and confession, it does not effect His forgiving me.


Shelia said...

Just this morning our preacher talked about recognizing our sin and repenting and seeking to study God's word and do His will. Thanks for the post.
Shelia-Abilene, Tx

Melanie said...

Hi Shelia ~ I so appreciate your comment. Confession and repentance are so crucial to intimacy with Christ, aren't they? I have a sister in Abilene!

Thanks again for stopping by to say hi!